You guys, if you shop at Amazon as much as I do, here’s your chance to win BIG BUCKS in Amazon gift cards! But first things first: I don’t know about ya’ll, but I have been living under a rock when it comes to discovering all the things included in my Amazon Prime membership. I just recently discovered Prime Video … Read More
How Telling Off My Kid’s Football Coach Kicked Off A Major Parenting Crisis
I never thought football could cause an existential parenting crisis, but this spring, that is exactly what it did. My almost-10-year-old son, Sam, wanted to play flag football for the first time ever, and since he’d had no interest in playing a team sport since he quit baseball a year ago, we jumped on the idea. Sam had played pick-up … Read More
Girls in the Hood: The First Time I Shoplifted
The first time I shoplifted, I was eight years old. At that time, we were living in a huge house owned by The Community in a neighborhood of Steubenville known as Belleview, and Sister Helen was still living with us then. You would think living with a Catholic nun would exorcise the orneriness right out of most kids, but I … Read More
Junk Food and Trash Talk: How To Love the Super Bowl When You Really Don’t
The Super Bowl is tomorrow, but I’m not one of those women who gets really excited about football or gives a pig’s ass about what’s going on in the game. I’ve actually managed to avoid it like the plague most of my adult life, but then I became the wife of a football fan. (A New York Giants football fan, … Read More
Where Are You, Christmas?
I may be more like a child than my own children when it comes to saying goodbye to Christmas. Even though some old-school Catholics like my mom believe that Christmas doesn’t truly end until after the feast of the Epiphany (when the wise men came to visit), I personally am not an old school Catholic (shocker). So I start feeling … Read More
My Boy Wore A Tigger Costume To the Thunderdome
This morning is “Dress Like Your Favorite Book Character Day” at my kids’ public school. My 4th grader Sam is OVER dressing up for Book Character Day (that’s for babies). Drew, in 1st grade, tends to follow his older brother’s lead. Plus he knows that at school, he can be laughed at for something as simple as an untied shoe; … Read More
I’m An Embarrassing, Tired, Scotch-Tape Mom Who Loves Her Kids
“I KNOW! It’s soooo embarrassing,” I heard my nine-year-old, Sam, say to his six-year-old twin brothers. “What’s embarrassing?” I asked, walking into our toy room, where they were building with Legos. “THIS,” Sam gestured impatiently with a swirling motion meant to encompass all the things. “This toy room. It’s full of baby stuff!” The twins nodded their agreement emphatically. “These … Read More
My First Six Years With Twins
Six years ago, I scooted my big army-tank ass out the door for an OB appointment. One hour later, I was sent to the hospital to have my SEVEN POUND twins! I was so anxious because our townhouse was in boxes; we were about 7 days away from moving to a new house, new neighborhood, new town with our almost 3-year-old … Read More
Tears, Laughter, and Poop Soup: My Listen To Your Mother Flashback
Yesterday, May 3rd, at 2:00 PM, the sound of Listen To Your Mother DC’s opening music, “Uptown Funk” reached my ears from my last place in line, as I waited with my cast mates back stage. I heard a burst of wild cheering and clapping from the audience, and I was overcome with emotion. I can’t cry now. Not NOW! Even … Read More
Dear Blue Bear (You S.O.B.)
Four weeks ago, something traumatic happened in this household. As a result, I wrote a letter on Facebook to the person, er, thing that was causing all the strife. The letter was met with an avalanche of support from people who wanted to help. So I wrote a letter to them too. Here are those letters. Dear Blue Bear, … Read More